Donald Trump’s Top 6 BIGGEST Mysteries.

By Nerti U. Qatja@VOP_Today


The simple answer is we have no freaking clue. Not a good start admittedly. But Trump himself claims he’s worth 10 billion dollars, whereas Forbes puts him at 4 billion, and some estimates as low as 3 billion. Ha 3 billion, what can you even buy with that in New York these days? Maybe a timeshare in a park bench that you’d have to share with an angry goose and a homeless Dean Cain? Poor hobo Superman, what does he even do anymore?


The last American military draft system began in 1940 and recruitment for the Vietnam war started on December 1st 1969, at which time Donald Trump was 23 years old and the proud owner of a perfectly normal haircut. But despite being completely eligible for the draft he never served once. Why is that?


Donald Trump has made some pretty astonishing claims in his time. He said he’ll build a wall across the Mexican border, he’s never seen a thin person drink Diet Coke, and that if Ivanka Trump wasn’t his daughter he’d probably be dating her. I’ll give him that last one, if Ivanka Trump was my daughter I’d go full on hillbilly with that girl.


Donald Trump really likes his name. He puts it on literally everything, from buildings and bottled water through to vodka, board games, steakhouses, chocolate, a magazine, a fragrance, and a shitty university. There are even Donald Trump sanitary towels, although admittedly he didn’t make these, we just thought it was cool that ladies can bleed on his face.


If you’re a fan of Donald Trump then your politics probably lean to the right, you hate gun control, you love unborn babies, and you like your walls to be longer than a Lord of the Rings directors cut. Republican voters have become mesmerised by Donald Trump’s bombastic speeches where he claims he’ll kick Isis’ ass and make America great again, and he might sound pretty convincing, but is Donald Trump saying what he truly believes? Or is he faking it for a more sinister reason?


Donald Trump began his voting life as a Democrat, before switching to Republican in 1987, the Reform Party in 99, back to the Democrats in 2001, back again to the Republicans in 2009, he registered as Independent in 2011, and back once more to the Republican party in 2012. His political views swing back and forth like Johnny Knoxvilles in Bad Grandpa.